It's funny how it hurts me; this love I've never had

So my oldest and dearest friend got engaged yesterday. I was not at all surprised, and in truth, really excited. They're pretty much the perfect couple, and I told her in the beginning if she screwed this up I would punch her in the face. She obviously hasn't been punched in the face.

I'm pretty excited. I get to be maid of honor - a first for me even if being a bridesmaid is old hat. 5 previous weddings makes me more than competent, I think. You know that old saying, "6 times a bridesmaid . . . " Oh, wait there isn't one that goes like that. Someone should make one up. The best one might get a prize. Perhaps a quilt made of all my old bridesmaids dresses?

All this being said, I am super happy for Steph and Kyle, but it makes me start to wonder. I'm starting to doubt my own social competence. I've never had a serious relationship. I have never even been on a date as an adult. It just makes a girl wonder.

I don't need an engagement ring or a long term commitment. It would just be nice if someone took me out to dinner. I'm just saying. A girl can dream.